This might sound like the cheesy-kind of advice your parents might have given you, but it really is true that confidence can get you pretty much whatever you want. That and being yourself.
If you want to get a date, succeed in your career, competing for a trophy, or otherwise take any aspect of your life to the next level, then boosting your confidence is one of the best ways to accomplish that.
Here’s why…
It's hard to disagree with the following motto: "Audentes Fortuna Juvat" - it's a Latin proverb translated in English as: "Fortune Favors the Bold." Confident people tend to be bold and by doing so, they put themselves in the position of winning.
"The wicked run away when no-one is chasing them,
but the godly are as bold as lions."
Proverbs 28:1, NLT.
What Confidence Really Means
If you have ever met an alpha male or a woman who just seems to have everything under control, then you might have noticed that they are usually very confident. The truth is that the whole reason they appear so successful is that confidence. That’s because confidence sends a powerful signal – it says ‘I consider myself to be a catch’ or "I can compete and win - and win like a true champion".
Speaking in evolutionary terms, confidence suggests that you are a good potential mate or a superior competitor. Even if someone is short, poorly dressed, and unappealing – if they are supremely confident then it will seem as though they know something you don’t. The assumption is that they must have a reason to be that confident. Mark Twain once said, "It's not the size of the dog in the fight that matters, but the size of the fight in the dog!".
And thus we instantly assume that this person is somehow our superior: that we should try to impress them or try to be more like them. That’s why we gravitate toward confident people, want to date them, and want to be liked by them.
A lot of people don’t realize the importance of confidence and they think it is enough to be nice. They assume that by acting nicely, they will get people to like them and they can that way overcome their looks, their stature, or their status.
But if you don’t have any self-confidence and you act very nice, then this can actually backfire: it starts to seem as though you want something and that you are being a creep in order to get it.
Conversely, if you act a little less needy if you can show yourself to be highly capable and impressive and then you chat with someone in a friendly and open manner… then people will be won over by your charm and your appeal. This niceness seems much more genuine because you appear like you don’t need help from everyone.
So to all guys out there: stop trying to win the girl by being nice. Work-out to fix your inferiority and the rest will take care of itself.
Employees out there, stop trying to get the job by being self-deprecating. Possess the razor-sharp skills relevant to your field and the rest will take care of itself.
To all students out there, stop cheating and use your intelligence to do your homework and the rest will take care of itself.
Act like you know your worth and then layer niceness on top of that. That is the winning combination or formula to success.
"How terrible it will be for the fearful and cowardly,
and for the sinner who leads a double life!
How terrible it will be for the faint-hearted who have no trust,
for they will not be protected!
How terrible it will be for you who have lost your nerve!
What will you do when the Lord brings about justice?"
Sirach 2:12-14, NLT.
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