What is the thing that is most holding you back from being the best version of yourself?
You might be tempted to say something along these lines of ‘time’, ‘energy’, ‘money’ or ‘opportunity’. Perhaps you feel limited by other people in one way or another?
I have a hunch, and let me tell you the one thing which is a big part of what’s holding you back is: your own sense of self. In other words: you might well be limited by your attachment to the ‘old you’. The other thing is the eagerness to be seen as consistent and reliable instead of focusing on what matters most - the actual results. You're wearing a personality mask to disguise yourself by expressing yourself and then trapped to go on to molds your appearance to fit the way people expected to see you. And as a result, your happiness depends on other people's approval. In a real sense, you appear to have no confidence in yourself and as a result, you can not think independently.
Matthew Kelly, the author of the book: Becoming the Best Version of Yourself, once said, "Freedom is not the ability to do whatever you want. Freedom is the strength of character to do what is good, true, noble, and right."
Please, I plead to you, the first step to becoming the best version of yourself is let the best version of you, that makes you unique, to start living towards your life's goals. Leave an unforgettable mark for the future generation that you existed and walked on this planet. You've to find your destiny. And to realize that, you've to nurse and nurture the best version of yourself
"Don't favor others so much that you harm yourself,
or defer to others to the point that you cause your own downfall."
Sirach 4:22, NLT.
Consistency
We all have an attachment to who we think we are. We all have a notion of ourselves and of who others think we are as well. For example, you may see yourself as someone lighthearted who is never serious. Or perhaps you see yourself as being a local at heart, who supports the local sports team and who would never leave home.
We like the sense of continuity that this brings and other people like the fact that they know where they stand with us.
We don’t want to do something that is ‘out of character’ and we don’t want to go back on things we’ve said.
But is this really something you should cling to? Maybe your concept of ‘you’ is outdated? Now you know better!
We should always strive to grow to maturity and be consistent with our conscience. Danish existentialist philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard once said "Face the facts of being what you are, for that is what changes what you are."
Adaptability is Key
If the chameleon taught us one thing, it is that adaptability is the most important trait when it comes to surviving and thriving. If you can’t adapt, then the world will change around you and you will become an anachronism.
Think about Covid-19, the Coronavirus pandemic the way it affected our social interaction. Who would have known the democratic nations would one day stay in the lockdown for months? To avoid the severe economic impacts of the lockdown, then you must be able to adapt to the new norms of survival like working-from-home with a high degree of adaptability.
With that in mind, what benefit is there for you to actively refuse to adapt and grow for your own and other benefits? Your success matters to others because the rising tide lifts all boats.
Have you ever wanted to do something differently, or take a sudden change in your life, but felt enormous pressure from people’s expectations of you?
If the answers sound familiar, then, this is the trap I'm talking about. And the irony is that many people are caught in it: the truest version of ‘you’ is simply the ‘you’ that God wants you to be. He is your creator and knows well your yesterday and tomorrow. Abide by his salvation plan and see what you'll be in the process.
Be consistent with your conscience and follow the moral laws. The best way to be ‘you’ is to drop all other unrealistic expectations and simply act at the moment based on your higher spiritual quest. This is not only the first step towards the-best-version-of-you but also it'll be the giant leap towards your true freedom.
"But I warn you - unless your righteousness
is better than the righteousness of the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees,
you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven!"
Matthew 5: 20, NLT.
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